Friday, December 02, 2005

How Do You Feel Sorry....

Is it right to feel sorry that someone who's life never intersected yours passes on? Is it right to write about loss when you've never read a single word of her writings?

I don't know La Idler. Yet, for some reason, I feel sad. I don't feel I have a right to feel sad, and this drives me nuts.

I fear death. Even though I am Christian and I believe in the Better Place, I still fear its arrival. I fear the end of things that I have yet to do. I don't know if any of these thoughts crossed Sondra's mind as she passed on. Perhaps my sorrow is only a pale reflection of my fear.

Perhaps there is a Better Place for Sondra. Perhaps not. I don't know what her beliefs are, and I don't feel right imposing mine on the dearly departed. What I do know is that I feel as if I've lost something that I never knew I had.

Or perhaps it is a stark reminder that we are all mortal, and we have but a short time. Perhaps it is a reminder to use my time wisely, and not let my fear of the unknown stop me from making sure lives intersect.

Rest well, Sondra. I knew you not, but thank you for your precious gift to me.

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