Tuesday, July 18, 2006

And So, It Ends

A week from my bar exam, it's over.

My marriage that is.

My wife and I have been discussing this back and forth for the better part of a month. I can't make her stay. I can't persuade her to stay.

Therefore, I can't stay.

I've made the arrangements as best as I can, and there's nothing more I can do.

I've given it my best shot, and it's not enough.

Update: I've made arrangements to fly back on August 15th.

13 comments:

BlackRX said...

You have my contact info. I will help in anyway I can. But I don't know what to say (type, really) about marriage in particular that will make you feel better, right now. I have not been good with relationship type stuff for years.

Other than: you've got another botak "number zero" hairstyle bro in me. Keep on keeping on. If you lose your way, remember you have got friends who will not hesitate to help you make your way.

Anthony said...

BlackRX,

Don't worry about it. I don't think anyone -can- console me now, but yes, I do remember my friends.

I think I'm going to keep my hairstyle. Botak brothers for the win!

vandice said...

As a long-time reader of this blog, this comes as a total shock Anthony.

Though I'm confused about the staying part (I presume she's staying in the States and you're not), I feel your pain.

I'm not married, but I was once a footstep from walking down the aisle. Like you, an ocean and 14 time zones came in between us.

At that time, I thought I loved her enough to set her free to pursue her dreams. And fly free she did these two years. Little did I know that in giving her up, I also gave up my tortured soul to perpetual night.

真的没有挽留的余地吗?

Anonymous said...

I'm also taking the bar in a week. This timing is really awful for you-- try to keep your head together. Hard times seem to come in bundles, good times come in bundles, too. You will get through this. And then, in ten years, you can look back and say to yourself, "my marriage ended the week I took the bar! I can handle anything!"

Anthony said...

Vandice,

It came as a somewhat less total shock to me as well. I'm still not sure I can articulate the reasons.

And no, I don't think there's any give in it. It wasn't long distance, I was here with her the whole time.

Anonymous

Thanks for your support. Good luck for the bar, I hope we both pass!

-ben said...

If you need someone to talk to, just give a hollah. I will even drive up to Berkeley at 3 AM if asked. I'm going through some massive crap myself, so... maybe we can take a different spin on the old adage, "misery loves company," and give it a run for its money.

God bless.

Anonymous said...

Bro,

I don't know what to say. I was just at your place last Saturday, and everything seemed fine.

If you need someone to talk to, give a holler. You've covered my back and given me more leeway than any brother should, so it's the least I can do.

If you need me to call, let me know what time, and email me your number, or I'll get it from Kai Ma or Rich.

For me, the tea has always been as thick as blood.

Your brother,
Nick

dawndie said...

Hey Kace,

This came as a shock to me. I know I haven't been talking to you much but if you need someone to talk to, please do not hesitate to message me on MSN.

I really really sorry things had to turn out like this. =( *hugs*

I'll catch up with you when you get back. In the meantime, please, take very good care of yourself.

Dawn

alchemist said...

Argh. Argh argh.

Anonymous said...

I have been your blog reader for some time and reading "And So, It Ends" has prompted me to write something here.

Having gone through a stressful patch in my life recently (including actuarial exams) it has made me realise not to give up, even in the bleakest moments. Sometimes, the lesson in life may be about letting go of things (and wishing them all the best), while other times it had been giving my exam markers no reason to deduct marks and many reasons to add to it.

Having prayed that if through these life lessons and knowledge that I would be able to help others in future, I have asked the 'Higher Ups' for me to pass through these trials and exams without successfully .

I pray the same for you today...

Anthony said...

Thank you, all well-wishers.

I've made a lot of progress since I put up this post. I'm not by any means giving up on what I believe in - and at the same time, no matter what happens from here on, I will know I've done my absolutest best.

alchemist said...

thass wrong; should be absolutest bestest... *grin*

A.Ball.of.Yarn said...

really sorry to hear about the news. get well soon..