.....when you realise that good intentions are merely a candy shell for cruel action. That, despite hard-won lessons, humans would rather make the same mistake over and over instead of learning from them. That we are trapped in our own worlds, and ne'er the twain shalt meet.
....when you realise that you are the only one who realises that there are many worlds, but only one true world. That others would rather be honest to you than honest to themselves. That what they say is entirely truthful, but dishonest because they are incapable of being honest with themselves.
I am constantly amazed by the capacity by which people are capable of deceiving themselves, and am utterly helpless in the face of such deceit.
What do you do then? Deny or accept? Be sad in your honesty or happy in a lie?
I only wish I knew.
Monday, September 17, 2007
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3 comments:
Hey Kace,
I like this entry - because this is something I have been feeling but unable to articulate. Every time something like this happens(people thinking they're just being honest with you but can't be, to themselves, that is), either to myself or others, I feel what you've just written - only it's a big mess of words and thoughts that only make sense, in my head. I just wish people won't judge because no one has the right to.
Take care, and if you need to talk, just pm me over msn ;)
-Dawn
As Keira Knightley once said: "I think kindness is a good quality, and that doesn't always mean honesty."
Well, she said that cos she was afraid of getting her pic taken, cos she suffers from acne.
Plus she thinks that having your pic taken is like destroying your soul. For said reason.
Really deep stuff.
Anyway, I kinda agree with the general sentiment that kindness comes first. Not that you have to lie to be kind. But if your intentions are kind, then if you choose to speak the truth, you will put it in a way that helps rather than destroys.
I also know people who need to say rude things, cos they hurt inside or they don't like themselves very much, but prefer to justify it by saying "I'm just being frank with you."
My response to people like that? "Don't inflict your sad shit on me. Fuck off. Thanks."
Actually, I was talking about self-honesty, the hardest kind to achieve.
What I was writing about is the fact that people can tell complete utter outright fibs, not because they are dishonest, but because they are delusional.
Well, of course if a guy genuinely believes the sky is orange, he can be honest and still telling an absolute fucking lie.
I am sad because I cannot reach out to these people. I get even sadder when I sense what is essentially goodness and honesty under a really thick layer of self-delusion and I think "what a fucking waste".
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