Friday, May 27, 2005

Hiding Out

It seems that the Singapore blogosphere decided to have a good time at Hideout last night. Kudos.

Yes, I knew about this tres chic event. No, I decided not turn up, even though the fanboi I am badly wanted to stalk Singapore Blogging Superstars.

If I turned up, Bad Things will happen.

I kid you not. There are some universal constants. Gravity holds the universe together. Motherhood is a good thing. I cannot be cool. If I become cool, the universe will end. I've even got case examples to prove it.

Case 1

A friend of mine decided to have his farewell celebration at Centro. We had arrived late and we had to queue outside for some time. The week before, I had bought a cool new pair of shoes (i.e they weren't black, leather and Scholls) and even spent an afternoon in a casino in Sydney. Normally, I would not have attended this farewell celebration, but it was a good friend and hey, since I was cool twice this week already, why not a third time? So I joked with my friends about my being so cool this week, and shared a few giggles.

Famous last words.

We waited outside for almost an hour before said friend appeared, said something to the bouncer outside, and got us all in. I didn't take more than seven steps into Centro proper before the unthinkable happened.

The music stopped. The lights stopped flashing. Uh oh.

Centro kenah raided that night. The friends I had been joking with gave sour faces - and promptly banned me from ever entering another nightclub with them. One suggested that I should blackmail other nightclubs with my attendance.

What a kharmic kick in the ass.

Case 2

My wife and I have a favourite restaurant off King's Arcade, on Bukit Timah. We used to visit it fairly often. We liked the food, we liked the decor, and we liked the proprietress. It was a wonderful chill-out place.

One day, some months after the events in Case 1, I made the mistake of proclaiming how cool the restaurant was to my wife.

The restaurant shut down a week later. The proprietress explained that there wasn't enough business in the area to keep things going.

Hideout

I can't turn up for blogging meets! They are too cool! If I turn up I'll be cool too! This can't happen! The universe counts on me to be uncool! There's no telling what will happen after! Hideout may close down! A*Star may issue a public apology! Or horror of horrors...

Singapore Bloggers may actually start supporting Straits Times Online!

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10 comments:

mb said...

Please come and join us next time lah. What uncool or cool one? You want to uncool? just join Miyagi and me, hahaha. I play the DJ console until kena complain by the boss, haha!

Anthony said...

-laughs-

Thanks for the invite, mb - but don't say I didn't warn you. :D

BiFF said...

how bad can it be... :) most we crash into the beng KTV lounge downstairs and instead of DJ music we get beng KTV songs...

must go and support DJ LimPeh aka DJ MB ... if not no one else will. :)

Anthony said...

I profess no great love with Beng KTV songs. Except "Ai Piah Jiat Eh Yia".

Next time! Especially if it's on a night where the World of Warcraft servers are down for maintenance. :D

MaKan GuRu said...

don worry lah, we all uncool one, the only "cool" one is too high class for us, so Mr. Lorbert Goh will never show one.

Anthony said...

Makanguru,

I think this must be the first time people have tried to convince me to attend an event by telling me how uncool it was!

One Little Twit said...

WAHAHAHAH. You make yourself sound like a "suay sin" (God of Suayness). But do join next time! I want to see how you are like in real person!

Anthony said...

one little twit,

You have no idea. I can't even say my reputation is entirely unreserved. I blame Apocalyptic Wen and Apocalyptic Mo for transmitting their virus to me.

Gloria said...

khayce you are so cool even mb asked implored you to go! But the world hasn't come to an end yet. I'm sure you are playing the 'tell me i'm cool' game. Think about the bloggers no one's heard of?! They are even more uncool than you!

Anthony said...

Gloria,

I assure you I'm not. Having a cool -blog- does not make you a cool -person-. I don't write things just for webpage hits okay?

Also, not say I own self say own self, but these events are true. :D